WHY I LIKE BARACK HUSSEIN O'BAMA
by Jim Marrs
Barack Hussein Obama may yet turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to the United States of America.
Obama has been caught in lie after lie. His National Security Advisor has stated he takes his daily orders from Henry Kissinger, the one man widely viewed as the architect of our disastrous Foreign Policy, the policy which has done so much to turn foreign extremists into implacable enemies.
Obama’s cabinet reads like a roster of secretive societies such as the Council on Foreign Relations, The Trilateral Commission and the international Bilderbergers. His cry of “change” now rings hollow.
Obama’s policy of continuing unrestrained illegal immigration will destroy the last vestiges of national cohesion. Gun-control legislation pending in Congress will eviscerate the Second Amendment. The new “Food Safety Modernization Act” will eventually outlaw private gardens. Soon only the giant multinational corporations will control all food and water.
Obama’s so-called Stimulus Package is widely viewed as throwing non-existent money after bad while rewarding malfeasance.
Obama’s brand of Marxist Socialism will continue to take from the poor and give to the rich, betraying his supporters.
Obama’s form of collectivism has socialized the banking system and now the auto industry. Others will soon follow. More power is being gathered into the federal government than could ever be imagined by his predecessors.
In following a Socialist philosophy which proved so fatal to communism, he has set the nation on a course for disaster.
He has helped further the dissatisfaction and disdain of the Executive Branch engendered by Bill Clinton and George W. Bush. It now joins the Legislative Branch which already has an approval rating that dips into the single digits. The Judicial Branch is packed with persons selected by former leaders now viewed as incompetent, if not criminals.
But the activities of Obama and his followers may have finally broken the illusion embraced by many Americans about the United States. They now see the empty political rhetoric for what it as – mere words followed by the inaction, or worse, the opposite of what was promised.
Americans now more clearly see that individuals, working at the local level, can take care of local problems better than a faceless, bloated and entrenched bureaucracy in Washington, D.C. More and more are realizing that citizens must regain their rights as free individuals.
The spirit of individual liberty is once again alive in the land. Many Americans today are putting aside the outdated politically-correct notions of liberal vs. conservative and Democrat vs. Republican. They are beginning to wake up to the fact that a handful of super-wealthy individuals and families, many with foreign entanglements, have long sought to control the free Republic of the United States and bring it to its knees.
Already, legislation to regain state sovereignty is moving in many state capitols. After all, without state’s rights how can there be any individual rights? Many Texans are even considering reclaiming their Republic, a legal move fully justified by the articles which brought it into the Union in the first place.
True freedom is on the move.
This is why I like Barack Hussein Obama
JIM Marrs…. book report
CROSSFIRE :THE PLOT THAT KILLED JFK
One can ask the question..... What in the world can one find out recently that has not been written about 100 times ? This is a very skilled writer and
his research is very thorough . The writer makes the startling connections...
Atsagi Japan is the CIA center for Asia. Lee Harvey Oswald...was stationed at Atsagi (coincidence ) ...?.....Japan... This Marine led a strange life...that has overwhelming evidence that he was a CIA agent ...Not that he was skilled or really highly intelligent but the circumstances surrounding many events raises the possibility that he was already working with them while in the military . Among others was the fact that he had contracted VD... he had a case of gonorrhea ...and the while the medical records display that he had indeed done so....his...military discipline records which usually carry the penalty of an article 15, has the thought provoking comment 'deleted and non-punished .' ..'sustained in line of duty ?..." How can that be ??
Perhaps the assignment that he had been given was in association with infiltration of a club... frequented by communists....one of the most expensive in Asia...where a single night's cost might run as high as $200 or $300.. dollars in the sixties were more precious….and Oswald had frequented the Velvet Club... of Atsagi.....(a marine private made about $280 a month ) ....
Upon his discharge...He had no trouble with either the money or the legal barricades to 'defecting' to Russia. ( most of we common citizens couldn't do that !!... One has to know someone....).....Information on his lifestyle there is sparse but sometimes thought provoking.... He had resided in an apartment complex...coincidently at the same address. as a Mafia...CIA...counterpart named John Ferrie.. from New Orleans....New Orleans comes up a lot in the underlying story and plot....
The connections between the Mafia and the FBI...and the CIA are overwhelming...They appeared to be working together....Judith Exner... a sexy dark headed vixen was dating...and having a torrid sexual love affair ....with both the head of the Mafia and JFK....
On the Watergate tapes...few persons have made the connection...Nixon has one conversation with his chief of staff...Halderman...where Halderman... talking to the president, concerning e. Howard Hunt, after having masterminded the Watergate break-ins…is on tape demanding $2,000,000 ...cash.. or "I'll blow the lid off everything "
Nixon is caught on those famous tapes, some transcripts which have only recently been declassified under the freedom of information act, saying "Let's give him the money or he'll unravel this whole Cuban -Castro- Kennedy thing.. This whole g---damm mess could blow up in our faces..."
Jack Ruby had made the claim .(in letters that have been certified to be his handwriting ) .LBJ. .orchestrated this whole thing... and J. Edgar Hoover would stand beside him and made sure the truth was concealed .." Actually John Kennedy was planning on removing Hoover after the next year's elections....Neither Hoover nor Johnson cared for Kennedy....This sentiment was also shared by Richard M. Nixon. ....
E. Howard Hunt... had said...Lyndon Baines Johnson masterminded the whole thing...
The writer comes to the conclusion...for all of Kennedy's enemies ...perhaps the most damaging and dangerous thing the had done to himself...was when he declared the Federal Reserve System to be the major threat to our country...and started weaning the banks from the reserve system...and initiated the legal formats and directives to accomplish this...
He had indeed printed up sixty billion dollars of Kennedy dollars....which our nation has the legal and the constitutional right to do... This writer .feels that this action created enemies that are hugely and immensely powerful.....and deadly....and no one since has had the audacity or the courage to attempt a similar action...
Hale Boggs, democratic senator, who was in line to be speaker of the house, .made the statement in congress. "The fabrications and distortions of the Warren commission speaks of a power and a brutality that compares in evil only to the butchery and the lawlessness of the Soviet Union or any other of the most barbaric nations."
His ambitions to become speaker of the house, the third most powerful seat in the American government were cut short by an untimely accident where his military plane disappeared while on a junket in Alaska, and he nor his plane were ever found. .
President Kennedy had initiated the order and had every intention to withdraw from Viet Nam. This would have been a major shift in policy for the nation with far reaching and profound consequences. Two days after the death of president Kennedy , this order was quietly withdrawn. The timing of an event of such magnitude, effected so quickly...and quitely.... after the event of the president’s slaying raises questions. If a movement of this enormity could have been effected so quickly, it must have certainly have had some aforethought . One might even suspect there existed a connection between the new order and the slaying.
A police informer, a person who was usually a very reliable informant , was on tape telling the chief police of Dade county immediately before the president's trip to Dallas,,,,,"They have set up the president to be slayed . They will use a high powered rifle and they already have a sap to take the fall."
To anyone with a grain of intelligence it should be apparent that John Kennedy was eliminated by forces desiring the continuation of the Cold War-an artificial conflict draining the assets of and greatly changing for the worst, the character of our nation. The clandestine arm for those Cold War forces was the Central Intelligence Agency –the destructive talents of which run the gambit from deception to murder.
One could feel the urge to discount all that one has been told or heard about in our history books. The truth is much deeper and more sinister ..
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A Splendid Trip
The professor and spin doctor Pister was standing in line at the airport reservations desk. He had a tight duffle bag packed and his carry on case. He had opted out for the folding type of chess sets versus the fixed board. In earlier discussions it had been determined that the folding board would have more utility and also the new set had magnetic pieces so that the positions of the board would maintain themselves during the flight.
Pister was all excited and he could not help himself as he babbled to some of the other prospective passengers around him. . He commented to one of the ladies “First time to New
York ? “
She didn’t answer. Pister continued “I go there often. You see I am a master chess player and my president has picked me to represent our firm in a major tournament. This is a reward for my professionalism as well as being an outstanding member of our cabinet.
"Often I go strolling along the lower East side and stop in at swank places in Greenwich Village. There is something about the sounds and atmosphere that really enthralls me. And to see the policemen riding along on their horses. What a sight !! There is no place like it. One of the first things I want to do is to ride the ferry out to Ellis Island. Then I think I will tour the statue of liberty. I mean I have looked forward to this trip for a long time “
The lady groaned , then she rolled her eyes towards the ceiling and walked away. “Maybe she is shy"... thought Pister. The spin doctor, Pister walked on up to the reservations clerk. She was a stern looking middle aged woman with a big swath of unruly gray hair. She barely looked in his direction . She frowned at him and then asked in an impatient voice …
“Yes ??”
“ I'm Professor Pister . I’ll take my tickets now please. “
“I don’t see your name here on my roster anywhere .”
“That’s impossible . Lady Shelley was to have made the arrangements for my flight . My name should be there somewhere. Look over the whole list . Are you sure ?
“Next please !!”
“Wait a minute!! Check again. I am sure there has been some mistake. Look at the register. Check the logs.... for Pete's sake....look again... “
The security guards showed up . “Is this man giving you any trouble mamn?”
“Yes he won’t get out of the way. He is causing a disturbance . I do have other ...paying...actually paying...clients...with tickets....“
“Please come with us sir “
Pister complied. He was not one to cause trouble. He had always been of a peaceful nature. Surely they would realize their mistake. Whatever the mistake happened to be , he was sure it could be ironed out.
How could this happen ? Lady Shelley had seemed to be on his side. She had stated that she had hoped he could go to New York.
This Pister had the terrible thought. Could she have done this on purpose ? Could this be an act of deliberate sabotage? Pister quickly dismissed the disturbimng line of thoughts from his mind. He was sure that Lady Shelley and Sir Leeper both had wanted him to have this trip. They had even stated as much .
As Pister was being led away by the guards, he tore away for a moment and raced towards the windows on the departure side of the building. He had gotten a good look at flight 1407 on departure.. This was to have been his flight. How could this be happening ? He was close enough to the main foyer area and was pressing his face against the glass. He could clearly see some of the passengers. Sitting by one of the windows near the front was a man who looked a lot like Sir Leeper. As Pister pressed his face more firmly against the glass the man saw him and waved and smiled. Pister had a look of shock as he watched the plane race down the runway and then it gained altitude.
“We’ll have to ask you to come down to the station with us sir .”
“What’s the charges ?”
“Impersonating a bona fide passenger. Being a vagrant. Being dead broke in a place of business. You don’t have a ticket. You don’t have any money. You don’t have reservations. And that chess board in your baggage could be used as a weapon. I’m afraid you will have some explaining to do.”
"A weapon ?"
"Yes. watch this. the guard had taken Pister's chess board out and was beating on another passenger with it. "Quite a deadly weapon as you can see."
From his cell Pister became belligerent and started yelling at the guards. ”Hey don’t I get a telephone call ?? What kind of joint are you running here ?? "
“Have you got a quarter ?”
Frantically Pister felt in his pockets. In all of the excitement , he had lost his wallet, his identification and all of his money.
He had to borrow a quarter from one of his cell mates.
They led him down to a hallway near the main office at Lou Sterret.
Pister slipped his quarter into the machine. .
He got in touch with the main office of Sir Leeper.
Pister told the secretary “Tell Leeper, I am in a bind. He has to do something . Tell him to do what ever he has to do. I need to get out of jail”
“Your name please ???”
“What ??”
“”Your name please.”
“Pister…Pister…dang it…Just tell him it’s Pister. “
"You spell that with a "p" ?"
"Well yeah. How else ? "
First name or last name ?”
“Just tell him Pister…”
"Will this be a business call or personal ? Was he expecting your call ? "
"Just go get him..."
“One moment sir. I will have to connect to the in air inter com on the continental flights. . He is enroute to New York. Please hold….”
After a lengthy pause.....
"Can you tell me the nature of this call please ?"
Tell him...hey....just go tell. the guy ..go tell him Pister wants to talk to him.."
In a moment the secretary came back on line. .
Secretary Leeper states that he has never heard of you. He said …"Don’t call this number again . He is off on a pleasure trip and doesn’t have the time or inclination to be aggravated. He said "Send the guy a dollar or something. He probably wants money "
"He even got onto us for not screening this call."
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.
.The Estoppo Decree
Professor Pister entered into the office of Sir Leeper. This one sir Leeper was an astute observer of the emotional and the mood level of any given situation and he quickly surmised that the professor was dead serious about some issue. Rather than try to ferret out the gist of the problem, he decided it would be best to be quite and let Pister unload what ever it was that seemed to be bothering him,
“Yes?”
‘Sir Leeper , I have a serious attitude problem with the driver of my limo seine Sir Todd. . As we did approach our destination , the main landing area of the administration and he had pulled to a stop, he then yelled to me
“Get out da Caw!! Get out da caw!!! “
So Pister, do you think this is a matter of national concern, the fact that your driver was rude to you?.”
Sir Leeper had been building his vocabulary with detailed tomes loaded to the gills with legal words and high faluting terminology . He was preparing for an exam that if successful would propel him to the highest levels and the most esteemed offices of national security. The new vocabulary was beginning to show forth in his conversations.
“Pister in a situation like the one you are describing, the legal ramifications become complex. . In the conversation as you have described , we have a person, a legal party, subject to the laws of society, fully capable of bearing a legal responsibility . capable of being sued, and assuming the possible ensuing burdens of law. We have one party who is herby named as an insultee and another legal person who assumes the role of insulter. . In some cases we even have the party of the insulted. Any rulings that I may be able to make would of course be subject to a judicial review, which then the insulter would have thirty days to make an appeal. I can not issue a decree without a prior written notice. . Then we have the questions of jurisdiction and jurisprudence “
“Jurisprudence? What does that mean . ?”
“It is simply where the one who has the jurisdiction hangs his hat. “
Pister nodded . He wasn’t sure about his understanding of the last statement but he did not want to appear to be a legal idiot. He felt it was best to just go along with the conversation. He did hope comprehension would overtake the issue at a better time .. “
"How long would the insultee have to appeal. ?"
"Three years from the date of the indicent or two years from the date of discovery whichever comes first ."
“Okay , I do believe that I have obtained a keen grasp of the legalities of the issues. But can’t we do something ? Why don’t you just issue one of them there estoppo orders ?
“You want me to issue a estoppo decree? “
“Yes .”
Help me out here . What would the wording of such a decree be ?”
Pister was happy to be asked to formulate a legal document.. He pitched right in with some of his own wording .....
Whereas,
on the given date and in the jurisdiction of the insulted,
Whereas
It is thus the opinion of the courts that the legal person of the insultee Professor Pister . without aforeknowledge and in lieu of any prepared defense did hereby suffer permanent and irreversible ego damage
Whereas the insulter, one Sir Todd did deliberately and with a high degree of malice and aforethought did hurl the vicious insults,
Wheras
This decree does issue an order from the courts presided over by one Sir Leeper , to hereby institue the estoppo order
Wheras
The accuser , one legal enity, a person, Sir Todd is herby enjoined to estoppo whatever he has been doing
This order super cedes all previous intructions and all other legal decrees
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A Wise Legal Person
The professor, Pister listened attentatively to the guest in his office. The statesman Sir Leeper had come with an intriguing legal problem. He had legally signed off on a contract, with an official person where certain delivery of goods was promised and if failure was to ensue, then the promissory note stated that Sir Leeper was to receive indemnity . The promissory note had stated that the sum was to be paid in cash.
Pister was proud that the statesman had come to him for his legal advise. Although Pister had not yet attained the title of legal adviser, he was rapidly headed that way. Just the other day he had commented to a cohort, a person of similar background that the day was coming when he would soon have many degrees. “I will soon have my sixty three degree" he had told this associate. The fellow associate was awed.
“That is an awful lot of degrees.” Pister had studied long and hard for the privilege of having sixty three degrees and it appeared that all of the studying was about to pay off.
He had even overheard Sir Todd telling the secretary of communications Lady Shelley that Pister was becoming a conduit of communications. Lady Shelley had commented “If anyone con do it, Pister can “
Pister was proud that his reputation as a con do it man . Intellectually his reputation was spreading far and wide. He walked around like a speaking legal tome of wisdom . His knowledge had become immense.
In this particular case, Pister listened wisely to all of the available evidence before coming to a ruling. He had decided against issuing an estoppo decree. Or a ruling and a writ of Habeus Corpus. He wasn’t too sure of the last ruling or what it meant in legal circles but he had learned to interject legal wisdom where it fit best. The courts had faired with little success in the estoppo decrees anyhow. He wrestled with the meaning of some of the later writs and rulings. He came to a common sense decision. “If a term or group of words sounds bad, it is probably illegal.:”
Finally Pister had come to a decision. He lifted his eyes toi the ceiling in a thoughtful pose, and clasped his hands together in a position that seemed to eximplify wisdom. . He had even worn his black robe preparing for the delivery of the final decision. It wasn’t that this black robe made him any smarter but it did give a bit of officialdom and added to the atmosphere of pomp and ceremony .It brought dignity to the occasion.
. He then gave his legal opinion.
Sir Leeper listened intently for he was sure that he was listening to the distilled wisdom of information that had been extracted and condensed from the wisdom of the ages.
“Sir Leeper, I find that in this case I have to rule for the defendant Sir Todd. You have exercised a scarcity of due diligence in that you have not performed the background interrogations to certify the financial goals of the defendant , nor had your ascertained the financial position of the defendant . You had entered into a contract with incomplete full legal knowledge. The background and the filing of such a claim was not based on the legal frormats of law and was thus ruled to be incomplete. “
“Certain transactions fall under the legal domain of being exempt .The transaction you have described has occurred without direct supervision of the TIC (toady-in-chief) To have effected such a transaction with the direct knowledge or aforethought of the officer of the firm puts your offer in doubt. The TIC has neither a written affidavit nor a writ to order, therefore no basis for a contract does exist.
“On this ruling Sir Leeper, I am sorry. “
Leeper glared at Pister as he left the office and Pister could hear him in the hall saying “I will file an appeal. I have thirty days from the incident or three days after acknowledgement, whichever comes first”.
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The world of deep sea fishing was stunned What had started off as being a routine fishing expedition had deepened into a classic struggle of man versus beast. This demanding contest had turned into a colossal and bitter contest that waged for hours under the hot baking sun and had drained the last ounce of energy of both, the hero who brought him in and the beast that the fisherman had landed.
They had battled to what appeared to be a standstill. In this classic endeavor there simply had to be a winner. The one who would wind up being triumphant would have to be the beast with the most intestinal fortitude and the strongest will to win.
There were moments when the outcome was in doubt. As Sir Todd had struggled with all of his might to bring the huge shark closer and closer, it appeared at times that the shark possessed the size and strength to bring the entire ship down with all of its crew. They could be lost to the murky depths of the deep ocean. or worse yet, swallowed by the jaws of this gigantic beast. But here stood a fisherman, man among men , who not allow this to happen. The crew owed their lives to the courageous acts of this warrior . . The battle had waged on under the hot sun.The effort had left him drenched with sweat.
Calling on all of his strength Sir Todd would fight furiously for each foot of ground and bring the gigantic shark in a little bit closer. His arms ached so much that he did fear that they might fall off and his hands trembled under the strain but he had kept the faith and continued the struggle.
At first it was believed that the shark might have been about eight feet long and weighed in at over 350 pounds.
It was later determined that these measurements would not do the shark justice. Perhaps it was about ten feet long long and tipped the scales at well over a ton.
As Sir Todd would later recount and relate the events, he could not help but add his own touch to the story. "Some scientists already are beginning to wonder if this shark could be a genetic or at least a DNA kin to the giant Megladone . believed to have been extinct for millions of years. These sharks were as large as a modern day school bus and were the terror of the seas. This particular shark was so huge that once we had landed him, by his sheer weight he had threatened to sink the ship.
"This classic struggle reminds me of the story depicted by Earnest Hemingway in his classic tale of "The Old Man and the Sea"
. . The shark showed spirit. At times I had considered the act of merely letting the magnificent beast go free as a tribute to his courage and the fight that he had put up, But luckily , this course of action, I did not follow. This shark had battle scars. He had perhaps won these as medals as a eternal testament to his will to struggle. Against lesser men he might have won once aginand saved his life, but on this day and on the episode, the shark had met his match.
"I did all of this without much help. My trusted aide E. F. Hutton , who was slated to be by my side failed to show up. What could I have done with a sleepy aide anyhow ?? He knew there was a demanding struggle in the works , one that could well prove to be dangerous. The perils of the deep ocean were far greater that those presented by his air conditioned room king sized bed in a luxury hotel. . He shrewdly weasled out with a doctor's permit. "I can't make it...I just can't , I have a giant sized headache and I am so afraid the struggle would be too much. Just tell me about it later.
Sir Tood had also reasoned. "That's okay. when I have the head and even the huge torso of this magnificent beast mounted in my room it will put to shame the small stuffed cat that E. F. Hutton kept on his wall...
That cat will pale in comparison to the trophy that I have won. . That cat mounted on E. f. Hutton's wall could have been chased out of town by a small mouse. "
"Pister wasn't much help either. He stayed inside of the cabin near the air conditioner and yelled advice from a safe distance. Not until the shark had been fully subdued did he venture out into striking range of the deadly beast. He cautiously neared the megaladon to get a better look . The shark just lay there watching us all with an evil eye waiting for a careless fisherman to get close so he could take down at least one victim. We could hear the teeth snapping together with each effort.
The entire episode had given Sir Todd a whole new sense of omipotence . When the president had shown up with a complaint about a lost camera, ,Sir Todd stated "Not to be a problem Mr. President, the camera is in your hat. "
"And wait, there's more. Here is your credit card also. Perhaps this magnificent feat had turned an ordinary man into a super hero with fantasic reseves of senses and insights.
As the sun set in the West, the yatch made its way to its mooring point, its crew tired but happy.
The fisherman Sir Todd was so keyed up from the excitement of the event,he had much trouble sleeping. He did not even attempt to sleep until seven o'clock of the folowing day. It was a glorious day for the history books.
The world of deep sea fishing was stunned What had started off as being a routine fishing expedition had deepened into a classic struggle of man versus beast. This demanding contest had turned into a colossal and bitter contest that waged for hours under the hot baking sun and had drained the last ounce of energy of both, the hero who brought him in and the beast that the fisherman had landed.
They had battled to what appeared to be a standstill. In this classic endeavor there simply had to be a winner. The one who would wind up being triumphant would have to be the beast with the most intestinal fortitude and the strongest will to win.
There were moments when the outcome was in doubt. As Sir Todd had struggled with all of his might to bring the huge shark closer and closer, it appeared at times that the shark possessed the size and strength to bring the entire ship down with all of its crew. They could be lost to the murky depths of the deep ocean. or worse yet, swallowed by the jaws of this gigantic beast. But here stood a fisherman, man among men , who not allow this to happen. The crew owed their lives to the courageous acts of this warrior . . The battle had waged on under the hot sun.The effort had left him drenched with sweat.
Calling on all of his strength Sir Todd would fight furiously for each foot of ground and bring the gigantic shark in a little bit closer. His arms ached so much that he did fear that they might fall off and his hands trembled under the strain but he had kept the faith and continued the struggle.
At first it was believed that the shark might have been about eight feet long and weighed in at over 350 pounds.
It was later determined that these measurements would not do the shark justice. Perhaps it was about ten feet long long and tipped the scales at well over a ton.
As Sir Todd would later recount and relate the events, he could not help but add his own touch to the story. "Some scientists already are beginning to wonder if this shark could be a genetic or at least a DNA kin to the giant Megladone . believed to have been extinct for millions of years. These sharks were as large as a modern day school bus and were the terror of the seas. This particular shark was so huge that once we had landed him, by his sheer weight he had threatened to sink the ship.
"This classic struggle reminds me of the story depicted by Earnest Hemingway in his classic tale of "The Old Man and the Sea"
. . The shark showed spirit. At times I had considered the act of merely letting the magnificent beast go free as a tribute to his courage and the fight that he had put up, But luckily , this course of action, I did not follow. This shark had battle scars. He had perhaps won these as medals as a eternal testament to his will to struggle. Against lesser men he might have won once aginand saved his life, but on this day and on the episode, the shark had met his match.
"I did all of this without much help. My trusted aide E. F. Hutton , who was slated to be by my side failed to show up. What could I have done with a sleepy aide anyhow ?? He knew there was a demanding struggle in the works , one that could well prove to be dangerous. The perils of the deep ocean were far greater that those presented by his air conditioned room king sized bed in a luxury hotel. . He shrewdly weasled out with a doctor's permit. "I can't make it...I just can't , I have a giant sized headache and I am so afraid the struggle would be too much. Just tell me about it later.
Sir Tood had also reasoned. "That's okay. when I have the head and even the huge torso of this magnificent beast mounted in my room it will put to shame the small stuffed cat that E. F. Hutton kept on his wall...
That cat will pale in comparison to the trophy that I have won. . That cat mounted on E. f. Hutton's wall could have been chased out of town by a small mouse. "
"Pister wasn't much help either. He stayed inside of the cabin near the air conditioner and yelled advice from a safe distance. Not until the shark had been fully subdued did he venture out into striking range of the deadly beast. He cautiously neared the megaladon to get a better look . The shark just lay there watching us all with an evil eye waiting for a careless fisherman to get close so he could take down at least one victim. We could hear the teeth snapping together with each effort.
The entire episode had given Sir Todd a whole new sense of omipotence . When the president had shown up with a complaint about a lost camera, ,Sir Todd stated "Not to be a problem Mr. President, the camera is in your hat. "
"And wait, there's more. Here is your credit card also. Perhaps this magnificent feat had turned an ordinary man into a super hero with fantasic reseves of senses and insights.
As the sun set in the West, the yatch made its way to its mooring point, its crew tired but happy.
The fisherman Sir Todd was so keyed up from the excitement of the event,he had much trouble sleeping. He did not even attempt to sleep until seven o'clock of the folowing day. It was a glorious day for the history books.
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....
The Awards Ceremony
The Professor Pister found himself in an uncomfortable position. It had befallen him to master the ending ceremonies of the new awards program . He looked over the massive crowds in the auditorium. He could spot many familar faces among the gathering.
In a seat fairly close to the front , pister had spotted the esteed secretary of state, Sir Leeper.
He had come to offer moral support and if needed a heavy round of applause. The spin doctor felt somewhat at ease knowing he had a friend in the crowd. Leeper knew the routine. If Pister told a joke that was unfunny or something, he knew he could count on either laughter or applause from his friend.
Or at least he had suspected that he could. Some recent events had left doubts in Pister's mnd . He never knew when this person might turn on him. .
Pister had endured the earlier part of the meeting which included a dramiatic and stunning performance. This meeting had featured breath taking porportions.
The FBI director Mac (the knife) Kevins had given the spin doctor a call and told him of an urgent meeting. Pister responded with a simple question .
"Can I not make the meeting if I have a headache ?"
:Mandatory !!1 " .... was the one word reply . Professor Pister grabbed the dictionary sitting beside his desk and looked up the meaning of the word. After studying the Webster's definition and meaning and its limited variations somewhat and giving the the thesarus entry a thoughtful reading, , he decided he would make the meeting.
He had to sign in. Top security officials well know that the best way to prevent a spy from infiltrating the group is to keep a log in. This group was so highly specialized that , to a man, they had all been fingerprinted.
We get paid a lot to be suspicious when we have nothing to be suspicious about. "
That had become the company motto.
He spotted an old Indian friend Geronimo at the meeting. Geronimo was an artist of sorts, perhaps this was a left over trait he had inherited from the Indians.Years ago we had fought these same Indians for control of this land. Now we were sitting at the same table talking peace. Times do change. Geronimo had recently moved out of his teepee and moved into a splendid home.
From time to time Pister would glance over his shoulder and admire the very deft and illustrive drawings of this Indian chief. He had drawn a dog that was so well defined and so real , it appeared that it might just jump off the page.
One could count the hairs on the dog's back. It was that real.
He glanced at the end of the large mahogony table where sat the secretary of state, Sir Leeper. .
Sir Leeper was highly engrossed in the minutes of the meeting.He would not look to tone side or the other. He was like a horse with blinders on. Pister recognized him immediately from the size of that large head.
. Sir Leeper had come to give the ceremonises 100% ofr his attention and it was clear that he found the speakers words to be entrancing.
Pister noted the presence of the newest agent, a special agent Norbert Van Michaels. Pister had not gotten to know the new spy that well but he felt like he would make a splendid addition to the staff as a member of the intelligence group.
Already this new agent had helped Pister and his newest student, the esteemed deputy secretary general CIA director Sir Toddson unravel some complex codes found in the newest inteligence guides.
After their studies, all three had agreed in unison and total admiration of the ones who had compiled the reports.
"Those guys in intelligence sure know their business. "
The FBI director had imported the speech patterns of a master of inteligence onto the speaker system. on doirectly to our speaker system , The very voice of one of the most highly esteemed legal minds in the intelligence industry. pounded though the microphones.
The room reamined spell bound. Pister couldn't help but note the rapt attention this assembly was paying to the speaker. they seemed to cling to every word and many had moved to the edge of their seats.
It was towards the end of this dramatic meeting that Pister was asked to present the awards and MC the event . .
Pister had been sitting directly behind the solid gold drill bit. there was a story there too. Only weeks before the solid gold drill bit had been stolen. It was a careless act.
Who in their right mind would dare steal a solid gold trophy right out from under the best intelligence minds in the business ?
It had not taken the adminstration long to realize that the bit had been dropped and that all the officers had to do was to be on the look out for one showing up with a busted chin.
As events had unfolded, the culprit was apprehended and the solid gold drill bit was returned to its rightful spot. The whole adminstration was proud.
As Pister approached the front of the assemblage ,
he took the envelope containing the name of the winner of the top award for professionalism and achievements.
He tore off the end of the envelope and then blew into envelope to open it wide. This was not an original movement. He had seen this done on the academy awards program. It had looked so classy that Pister tried it himself.
He pulled out the name and in a suspenseful moment, he stated, the winner of this year's awards goes to.....
Marloon .....
No one responded. .
Feeling a little awkard, Pister tried to pronounce the name again. Perhaps he had misread a letter or two in the name and he was simply mispronouncing a otherwise quite typical name .
Maloon ???
Still no response .Pister glanced down the ceremonies table and looked at Sir Leeper. Perhaps he could help. He knew everyone that Pister knew.
Would he not help at this critical moment and help identify the person whose name Pister was holding ?
No such luck. Sir Leeper just glared back with an icy stare. . .
The moment was getting more awkard by the minute.
Merlin ????.
He had remembered an incident from several months ago when Pister had been to another awards ceremony with one named Merlin or something like that. .
In that set of circumstances it was determined that Merlin had a pronounced hearing difficulty. Could that be the case or was Piste simply mispronouncing the name ???
Malin ???
Pister walked awy with his head hung low in disgust. These awards ceremonies were certainly no picnic.
A Wrongful Tort
Society doesn't always perform the way it should or as we would hope or expect. When things do go wrong, however, one can hope to be represented in court by one as skillful as the spin doctor and professor from the capitol area, This master of the legal systems, F.Lee Pister was stating the case of his defendant, one Sir Toddson who had been greviously injured in a vicious assault with a motor vehicle.
My client, one Sir Toddson, has always been the eptitome of highway courtesy. While other drivers are prone to push and shout and jostle their way, my client has always exercised pristine manners and a gentle highway demeanor. He was once nominated for the roadmanship of the highways award. A better and more saftey oriented driver could never be found.
He would often slow down to allow the other drivers the right of way or permit them to gain access to a tight spot. He would do so with the most gracious of manners.
"If it would please the courts, I would like to state the wrongs that Miss Jo Anna De Guzzlesalot . did to my client. With malice and aforethought , Miss Jo anna De Guzzlesalot had recklessly acclerated her vehichle to an incredible speed , disregarding the saftey of her fellow motorists,. and also totally disregarding the admonitions of the surrounding motorists to slow down, . She then proceeded with a vicious sneer on her face and a devil may care attitude, she proceeded to the crash point. With a look of sheer vengence, and a disdainful sneer, she then with earth shattering force rammed into the rear of my client.
"Jo anna De Guzzlesalot, you had endangered my clinet with your reckless actions. You must now pay ".
The extent of the injuries and the total damage to the body and the psyche of my client cannot be described by words alone. I have asked him to make an appearance to demonstrate to the jury the full rxtent of these injuries.
If it will please the courts...Pister then nodded to the attendants at the rear of the courtroom..
The opened up a door to allow acess to the courtroom.
"The other door too.!!!!" Pister admonished a thoughtless attendant.
He thought to himself, "
These attendants are the same type of persons who have done such grevious harm to my client.
When both doors had been fully extended the injured client rolled in.
The jury groaned. One finicky juror on the second row, gasped, moaned and then fell backwards across the pews to the rear of her row. She then bounced sharply off the edge of the pew and then tumbled to the the wooden floor. A group of EMT's were standing by and rushed over to aid the stricken juror.
Pister rushed over to comfort his client who was a pitiful sight. He had his neck in a brace to restrict the movement of his neck and both legs were extended in front of the wheel chair. He motored the best he could with his one good hand while the other one lie frozen and immobile held rigid by a thick cast.
"There now sir Toddson, we are going to do things right. Don't hurt yourself. Just rest assured that we will win here.
"Let's concentrate on how much these injuries are worth and what it will take to restore you to your normal productive self"
Then Pister put to his client an incoming call from the president.
Sir Toddson was reassured as the president expressed his sympathies .
"Take your time healing. Sir Toddson, we know you have been injured terribly and your primary concern and focus is to get into good health before returning. Don't be in any rush to make it here.
We are with you ."
